by Carolyn Edlund
For many artists, it’s one of the most frustrating truths: the people closest to you don’t ever completely seem to see your art as “real work.”
Have you ever felt that the very people who ought to support you emotionally don’t understand the commitment you feel for your art? The words, perhaps unwisely spoken, “you have a hobby” or “you’re just in a phase” can cut deep when thrown at you by a loved one, as if they think that the passion you hold for what you create is something you could easily just put aside.
Many artists are rarely taken seriously, particularly in the stages of finding their style, medium, and some basic portfolio of work, by those who have not made art a full-time job. Even artists who sell work and maintain a regular practice may still hear comments like: “You’re so lucky you get to work from home!” or “Can you run this errand for me. You’re free this afternoon, right?”
That can sting, and it does sting, particularly when you have made sacrifices. You may spend years honing a skill, building a practice, and struggling to carve out time to create.
So, let us talk about this rather openly and approach some solutions.
Why do they not understand it?
For most people, work means punching in and out, office, schedule, a boss, and paychecks every two weeks. The creative life does not fit in there. Your world of non-artist folks simply cannot see, between all the invisible hours of learning, planning, promoting, and producing, what has gone into your art career.
To those who do not know, if you work from home, your “home life” and “studio life” look rather blurry. To them, it feels like you are available 24/7, even when important painting work or important preparation for a show is in progress.
It is not that they mean to harm you. They simply have no idea what your creative practice really asks of you.
The emotional consequence
When your art is not taken seriously, it could erode your self-belief. You may also start to question your priorities or feel guilty for having guarded your creative time. Some artists also try to overcompensate, saying “yes” to every family request but quietly and subconsciously leaving their art for last.
That can lead to burnout and resentment. When you are so used to having to justify the significance of your art, you cannot pour your energy into it since you are already exhausted from battling for its existence.
Always remember this: Your art is important. The discipline, creativity, and bravery it takes to produce and share it are signs of real work — the type that adds something significant to the world.
Reframe the talk
Instead of arguing for your legitimacy, change the approach to an educative one.
- Use professional terminology. Talk about your studio hours, clients, and projects instead of your time spent creating. The words you choose help shape public perception of your professional standing.
- Share your goals. Keep family informed about shows, commissions, or deadlines. When they see structure and milestones, it feels more real.
- Celebrate your victories. If you are proud of it, post it — or mention it at family time. The more they see you as a winner, the more they will see your art as a serious pursuit.
Through this accumulation of exposure—watching you work and hearing about your plans—they will come to find it familiar and begin respecting it. (There is a psychological principle called the mere exposure effect that says people like what they repeatedly see. It works here too!)
Set boundaries
Boundaries are not walls; they are avenues of communication. Take time to tell your family when you are unavailable and why. Here are some ways to do that:
- Schedule your critical studio hours as absolute commitments and guard them fiercely.
- Use symbols. A closed door, a studio sign, or headphones serve as constant reminders that you are “at work.”
- Consistency is key. The more predictable your routine is, the easier it will become for others to respect it.
- Realistically assess your caregiving and family obligations. You may not have eight uninterrupted hours per day, but even two concentrated hours for studio practice can create magic if you defend it intentionally.
Build support
Not everyone will “get it,” but you have the opportunity to build a support system of those who do. Foster relationships within artist communities both online and locally. Fellow comrades speak the language of creative dedication, and they understand you. This kind of support is invaluable against any possible lack of recognition at home.
Never underestimate the power of showing, not telling. The more consistent you become and the more your art business develops, the more your family and friends are ultimately going to see what you were talking about all along.
In conclusion
It isn’t easy, but it is possible to navigate the balance of your art career with family expectations. Clarity, communication, and commitment to your goals will see you through.
Setting limits is not selfish. It is honors your art, your business, and yourself. This consistency often converts misunderstanding into respect over a period of time.
You are also showing your loved ones what pursuing a calling looks like. And that is worthy of some serious acknowledgment.